The Book-keepers Forum (BKF)
The Book-keepers Forum (UK) -> Introductions and Time Out -> Friday Fun 13.3.20
Post Info TOPIC: Friday Fun 13.3.20
Leger


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 3904
Date:
Friday Fun 13.3.20
Permalink  

The first one is hot off the press as I have literally just read it and it made me LOL

 

Anyone want to buy 100 scotch eggs and 150 bite sized sausage rolls?

I've misread the headlines and thought everyone was picnic buying

--

My daft mate Dave has just got back from the loo after being in there for 30 minutes

The boss wanted to know why he'd been so long

"Washing my hands" he said "I forgot the words to happy birthday, so I sang Bohemian Rhapsody twice as I know that one"

--

I was at the supermarket checkout yesterday when the guy in front puts a a packet of condoms on the conveyor belt.  I put the divider in place and placed my bottle of ketchup on the belt. He looked a bit embarrassed so I laughed and said "It looks like we've both got something to put on our sausages"

--

Becks  was shopping in Walmart and saw some thermos flasks.  He asked the assistant what they were for.  She said you put food or drink in and it keeps them hot or cold.  He buys one and takes it home and Posh says" Whats that babe"  He says it's a thermos flask and it keeps things hot or cold.  The next day at the LA Galaxy training ground he gets out his flask and his team say "What you got there boss?" Becks said "It's a thermos flask, it keeps things hot or cold"  "And what you got in it boss?" they replied.  Becks said "two cups of coffee and a choc ice"
 
--
I ordered a Chinese takeaway last night. Went to pick it up and as I was driving home, I heard the bags rustling and moving!!

I thought what on Earth is that. Has something got in the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out at me.

I was driving so I leaned forward, picked up the bag, put it on the passenger seat and there it was again, more rustling and little eyes looking out from behind the prawn crackers.

I thought its got to be a rat or a mouse or something, so I carefully pulled the bag down ...

You don't know how relieved I was when I discovered it was just the Peking Duck.


--
 
 
 


__________________

John 

 

 

 Any advice given is for general guidance and professional advice should be sought applicable to your circumstances.
Cheshire


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 8646
Date:
Permalink  

Had to say - was a little groan on the last one!

The first - yep, well Ive just been to the supermarket for my normal shop - OMG, folk are BARKING MAD. No toilet roll, very few eggs (!), no pasta, no parking spaces, but hey they had a million Easter Eggs so Im happy.

Well done John for keeping the BKNers spirits up.

Talking of booze, I might swap my usual espresso martini out today

BKN10.jpg

Random one

BKN101.jpg

 

Back on theme

BKNN.jpg



Attachments
__________________

 Joanne 

Winner of Bookkeeper of the Year 2015, 2016 & 2017 

Thoughts are my own/not to be regarded as official advice,which should be sought from a suitably qualified Accountant.

You should check out answers with reference to the legal position
Riel


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 67
Date:
Permalink  

got a dad joke for you be warded it's bad - how do you get Picachu on a bus..poke im on

__________________
Riel
Leger


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 3904
Date:
Permalink  

Keep 'em coming lol

The major supermarkets have just announced panic buying restrictions.

Latest purchase limits placed on shops, in light of the Coronavirus due to panic buying;

ASDA: 2 hand sanitisers and a 4 pack of toilet rolls.
TESCO: 1 hand sanitiser, 500g of rice and 4 pack of toilet rolls.
MORRISONS:  2 hand sanitisers, 2 packs tolilet rolls and 1kg Pasta.
ALDI: a MIG welder, a pink sports bra, 2 trumpets and 1 wetsuit.



__________________

John 

 

 

 Any advice given is for general guidance and professional advice should be sought applicable to your circumstances.
Cheshire


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 8646
Date:
Permalink  

Riel, that reminded me of this one...absolutely want to do this sometimes

BKNA.png



Attachments
__________________

 Joanne 

Winner of Bookkeeper of the Year 2015, 2016 & 2017 

Thoughts are my own/not to be regarded as official advice,which should be sought from a suitably qualified Accountant.

You should check out answers with reference to the legal position
Cheshire


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 8646
Date:
Permalink  

Leger wrote:

Keep 'em coming lol

The major supermarkets have just announced panic buying restrictions.

Latest purchase limits placed on shops, in light of the Coronavirus due to panic buying;

ASDA: 2 hand sanitisers and a 4 pack of toilet rolls.
TESCO: 1 hand sanitiser, 500g of rice and 4 pack of toilet rolls.
MORRISONS:  2 hand sanitisers, 2 packs tolilet rolls and 1kg Pasta.
ALDI: a MIG welder, a pink sports bra, 2 trumpets and 1 wetsuit.

 John, I saw this earlier today and it made me giggle.  Ive just been to Aldi and stocked up on my Mig welders, although Im worried I dont have enough pink sports bras.

Thought you might like this one... Shaun will after his last avatar Im sure.

face.jpg

 



Attachments
__________________

 Joanne 

Winner of Bookkeeper of the Year 2015, 2016 & 2017 

Thoughts are my own/not to be regarded as official advice,which should be sought from a suitably qualified Accountant.

You should check out answers with reference to the legal position
Leger


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 3904
Date:
Permalink  

Hi Joanne

Yes, I saw that one lol. It's good that in the face of adversity, we haven't lost our sense of humour. 



__________________

John 

 

 

 Any advice given is for general guidance and professional advice should be sought applicable to your circumstances.
Shamus


Forum Moderator & Expert

Status: Offline
Posts: 11981
Date:
Permalink  

Leger wrote:

Keep 'em coming lol

The major supermarkets have just announced panic buying restrictions.

Latest purchase limits placed on shops, in light of the Coronavirus due to panic buying;

ASDA: 2 hand sanitisers and a 4 pack of toilet rolls.
TESCO: 1 hand sanitiser, 500g of rice and 4 pack of toilet rolls.
MORRISONS:  2 hand sanitisers, 2 packs tolilet rolls and 1kg Pasta.
ALDI: a MIG welder, a pink sports bra, 2 trumpets and 1 wetsuit.

 I was just trying to read that one to my son and why laughing so hard that I was crying and couldn't even get the words out. Absolutely brilliant.



__________________

Shaun

Responses are not meant as a substitute for professional advice. Answers are intended as outline only the advice of a qualified professional with access to all relevant information should be sought before acting on any response given.
Cheshire


Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 8646
Date:
Permalink  

BKNZ.jpg



Attachments
__________________

 Joanne 

Winner of Bookkeeper of the Year 2015, 2016 & 2017 

Thoughts are my own/not to be regarded as official advice,which should be sought from a suitably qualified Accountant.

You should check out answers with reference to the legal position
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
The Book-keepers Forum (UK) -> Introductions and Time Out -> Friday Fun 13.3.20
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us
Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
©2007-2024 The Book-keepers Forum (BKF). All Rights Reserved. The Book-keepers Forum (BKF) is a trading division of Bookcert Ltd. Registered in England Company Number 05782923. 2 Laurel House, 1 Station Rd, Worle, Weston-super-Mare, North Somerset, BS22 6AR, United Kingdom. The Book-keepers Forum and BKF are trademarks of Bookcert Ltd. This forum is a discussion forum only. There will usually be more than one opinion to any question and any posting should not be viewed as a definitive solution. No responsibility for loss occasioned to any person acting or refraining from action as a result of any posting on this site is accepted by the contributors or The Book-keepers Forum. In all cases, appropriate professional advice should be sought before making a decision. We reserve the right to remove any postings which are offensive, libellous, self-promoting or engaged in covert marketing. We will not notify users of removals. The views expressed in the forum posts are those of the individual and do not necessary reflect or agree with those of The Book-keepers Forum. Any offensive or unsuitable posts will be removed by the moderators. Any reader of this forum can request for a post to be looked into by sending an email to: bookcertltd@gmail.com.

Privacy & Cookie Policy  About