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Post Info TOPIC: Christmas Crackers


Master Book-keeper

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Posts: 3904
Date:
Christmas Crackers


A christmas themed joke page.  Happy Christmas everyone.

 

The AA have warned anyone travelling in icy  and snowy conditions should take a shovel, blankets/sleeping bag, extra clothing (including scarf, hat and gloves), 24hr supply of food and drink, de-icer, rock salt, torch, spare battery, petrol can, first aid kit and jump leads

I felt right idiot on the bus

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Three men die in a car accident on Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the Pearly Gates waiting to enter heaven. On entering they must present something relating to or associated with Christmas. The first man searches his pocket, and finds some mistletoe, so he is allowed in. The second man presents a cracker, so he is also allowed in. The third man pulls out a pair of stockings. Confused at this last gesture, St Peter asks, 'How do these represent Christmas?' He said 'They're Carol's.'

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What's the difference between Snow men and Snow Women ?  Snow balls

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I got a Christmas card full of rice in the post today.  It was from my Uncle Ben

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And one I got in a Christmas cracker the other day:   Why did the mechanic sleep under the car?  Because he wanted to get up oily in the morning.



__________________

John 

 

 

 Any advice given is for general guidance and professional advice should be sought applicable to your circumstances.



Master Book-keeper

Status: Offline
Posts: 8646
Date:

laughing.gif

 

Staying on the Christmas theme....

Turkey.jpg



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__________________

 Joanne 

Winner of Bookkeeper of the Year 2015, 2016 & 2017 

Thoughts are my own/not to be regarded as official advice,which should be sought from a suitably qualified Accountant.

You should check out answers with reference to the legal position

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